When I grow up

I want to be Cinderella! That was my 8 year old answer to growing up. I was a spoiled child. Not rotten in need of a swift kick in the ass. I was made walk the line. I have mentioned before that I was raised in Free Will Baptist household. We were at the church every time the doors were opened. I had chores and responsibilities... but I was spoiled too. I am an adopted only child. Makes for a special kid. I was wanted, chosen and planned for. Since I was so darn special, my parents wanted to give me everything my little heart desired. It was an enchanted life. So it makes sense that to me growing up to live life like a fairytale was certainly plausible. I expected the ease and gentleness of my parents house to simply flow over into mine when adulthood dawned. Their perfect marriage, bills always paid, check book in the black. I expected to take family vacations with my children, and I expected it all to just somehow... happen.

I have had to build my life like the rest of the world. I was not ushered to the door of my home in a carriage fashioned from a pumpkin. I have learned to accept the struggles as learning experiences. The kids and I have eaten many potato chip and whatever is in the cabinet" casseroles. We have had garage sales at our Secion 8 housing apartment to buy gasoline. Over time I have been blessed to be able to establish a life for my children and I, we are doing quite well now.

This past CHRISTmas I was very proud of the spread I was able to put underneath the tree. There were actually gifts worth more than few dollars and many of them. I watched with anticipation as they tore through the paper and ribbon. They were pleased, and i was too. I felt it was one of the best CHRISTmas' we had had so far.

A few weeks ago I mentioned to my son that I felt this way, He is 14 going on 20 and sometimes the thimgs that he says really throw me for a loop. This was one of those times. He ponders what I said for only a second then says "know what mom?" "I think the best CHRISTmas' were the ones where we really didn't have much but each other." "It made everything small feel so big!"

Guess I am doing something right!

Copper