An 80's baby

I had a fun childhood. Kids today are too tied into technical, electronic, and expensive interests. What ever happened getting out of school for the summer and spending almost all day outside. We were either able or forced to entertain ourselves with limited supplies.

What ever happened to games like:


Kick the Can


Hide and Seek


Red Rover, Red Rover


H.O.R.S.E. or


Mother May I?





What about the cartoons? There were no super computer-animated graphics, just hand drawn wholesome characters. Do you remember:


The Smurfs


The MonchiChi's


Rainbow Brite


Jem and the Misfits


Sailor Moon


He-Man





Then I became a teenager. Late 80's rap, rock and pop:





Too Short


Run DMC


Cindy Lauper


Madonna


Toto


Prince


Easy-E


Michael Jackson


Kix


Joan Jett


Lita Ford


Alice Cooper





I had the big hair, the off the shoulder ripped tees, torn acid washed jeans. Wore hot pink lipstick and bright blue eyeshadow. I was cool! no, I was Rad!





The 80's: A happy time to live.

Falling Down

Friday was painful. There is no real way to tell you about this and depict the scenario in real-life quality, but I will give it a try:

As you well know, the last few weeks have been exhausting for me. By the end last week, the kids, the old man and work had all taken their toll on my body and my sanity. So, it was not surprising to me that when I got home on Friday, to an empty house, I laid on my bed with the intentions of consuming a bit of alcohol and watching CSI.

It all began well. Vodka and Cranberry, two ice cubes, short glass. Fresh pack of smokes and the remote. The episode of CSI that was coming on I had seen previously. It usually makes no difference because Warrick keeps my interest. But this time even he could not keep me awake. I fell into a light comfy slumber. A little while later I am startled awake by knocking at the front door. I set up straight and swing my legs around, preparing obviously, to see who has came to visit.

At this point, I have no idea that I have been resting in a position that evidently cut all circulation off to my left leg, from the hip down. Now I am not talking about the "falling asleep" that still allows you the warning tingle, you know the one that says " Hey! Thought ya might wanna know that I am NOT fully functional right now!" See I didn't get the message. My leg was asleep to the point of absolutely no feeling, from the hip down.

I jump up, take one step and hit the hardwood floor ~ HARD ~ with my left ass cheek. The knocking continues. I pull myself up, still unsure of what the hell just happened, and fall again! Same cheek, this time adding a 3inch scrape to my ass. Now I begin to crawl... In pain. I get to the door, whoever was there has now gone and I lay against the wall, breathing heavily.

THE AFTERMATH

Bruises on both elbows

Football size bruise in my left thigh

Long scrape on my ass cheek

Carpet burns on both knees

Still tired...

Copper

Are you peeking?

I was inspired by Bart's last post (http://www.bartraeke.com/2007/05/roll-call.html). I HAVE a stat counter and just in the last few weeks, have payed attention to all of the information that it can provide. What I have found is that this information is really more irritating than helpful! I get all kinds of useless information. Like the operating systems of the users that visit this place. Why do I need to know that? What am I ever gonna do with the knowledge of the screen resolution that you guys have? It DOES tell me the country and region that people are logging on from. But that about as exciting as it gets. SO...

If I could possibly be indulged for a moment, could any of the readers that I don't know exist let me be aware of you? If you don't have a blogger account, you can post an anonymous comment and at least let me know WHY I interest you... In fact, I would kind of like to know that from everybody "Why do I intrigue you all enough to continue to read me?"

I most definitely am not posting this to scare anyone off!! PLEASE, PLEASE don't go away! I am just curious as to who and why..

So, thank you Bart, for inspiring me. Hope you don't mind. You are always a great read!!

Now everyone play the game with me, please..

Copper

A reference, an apology, and a dream

Some of you many remember this post:

http://copperstiletto.blogspot.com/2007/02/holy-matri-what-hell.html

I was hurt and yes a little angry. But I suppose that I also over-reacted. This a very special kind of man and I owe him an apology. He has found love, and even above that, he is doing what is right for his family. She is good woman and mother. I am certain that she will make him happy. I have no right to be jealous or angry. But I do envy her!

But, I do not have to, and would not, release my dream of happiness. I have said that I always want what I cannot have. But I am allowed to dream whatever I please...

The Pisser

We have three restrooms at my office. All of them uni-sex. Personally, I try to avoid the use of ANY public restrooms, including the ones at work. Of course, during a 9 to 10 hour day, I find myself needing to make use of the facilities at least once. Now comes the question: Which restroom is safest today? Sounds silly, huh? Well not when you take all the players involved into consideration...





1. The janitor: He is supposed to keep things clean and tidy, right? Well, when you smell of cheap wine and Beech-Nut (chewing tobacco), it is hard to leave the essence of "clean" in the air. So its best to "go" before he gets started on the restrooms for the day





2. The shitty secretary: Nice lady, got to love her.. except that every day around 2:00, you know to avoid the restroom beside the fax machine. In fact, best practice would be to make sure and send ALL faxes for the day, before lunch. The aroma tends to bleed through the door frame and contaminate the entire fax/copy room area





3. Mr. Pissy: Its simple, he works Monday, Wednesday and Friday. His office is near the main conference room restroom and he can't aim. Nuf' said.





4: Various Vagrants: We get a lot of drop in "potty dancers" that come to the front desk asking to use the restroom. They are sent to one in the lobby. But odds are that they spend much more time "shootin up or smokin up" than "zipping up". We have found their various articles and instruments, left behind in their haste. It's great!





So where does all this leave me? Balancing on my toes so that my ass is at least 2 inches away from the seat, trying to pee into the hole in the center, holding my clothes from touching the floor. Breathing as few breaths as possible and trying desperately not to black out.





Good times!!

My secrets

Everyone here already knows that I am a huge fan of http://postsecret.blogspot.com/. I was reading this weeks entrys and the very first one reminded me of a secret of my own. SO.. I decided to make a list of some of my secrets, that if I had time, I would make postcards for and mail in myself. I wonder if this will be embarrasing or liberating, but here goes:

Since my grandfather passed away, every time I see an old man I have the urge to run up and hug him. Usually I just try not to cry.

I am embarrased that I had my first child at 15

I blame myself for my second childs disability, I feel like my body failed her

I am never satisfied

I get mad when I see happy couples, I thought that we all should be able to have that

I am jealous of Barbie, she has everything that I want

When I get stressed, I have an alternate life that I revert to in my subconcious

I happen to LOVE the fact that I am adopted and it makes me mad when people say

"Oh, thats so sad!"

I compare myself to almost every woman I meet.

..... thats enough for now

Missing

Immature? (hurt feelings)

I wish that every man that has ever looked at me and said that I was immature could walk around in my 4inch heels for a day! I hate letting ANYONE down! But sometimes it is inevitable! I try very hard to please everyone. I know it can't be done, but I still try! I have many people that are in positions to ask certain things of me. I want to please each and everyone of them, but when circumstances arise that make me choose one person's needs over the other, someone ALWAYS ends up disappointed. I guess that I do not always make the right choice, but in most cases I don't actually see a RIGHT choice, just choices. I was told today that I am blind even though I walk around with my eyes open. This was from someone that I have much respect for and I wish had a little for me. I don't understand why I want this person to be pleased with me, cause the truth is that I feel if I ever was able to, it would be short lived.

More from Red Heifer and Big Momma

I got an email from Tracie:

Hey listen to this BULL SHIT........
well this week Trena asked Rob to work on every other weekend for her at a site because she doesn't have staff and he is looking for a 2nd job every other weekend and PRN on Mondays... Well he said ok that he would and did his training this week after he got off work and now she (Big Momma) changed the policy and now it states that no one that is related to anyone can work here.....
SHE IS A BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am so tried of this shit i can scream....
and mom is so stressed out she can cry....
i am glad someone can get out of this HELL hole.....
well i had to get out somewhere and you were the lucky one.....
Sorry it had to be you!!!!!
Hope you have a great day!!!
Love ya girl!!!!
Tracie

Then I got this one:

girl there is so much shit going on here it isn't funny you better be glad you got out of here when you did....
Remember me telling you she change that one policy that family couldn't work here....
well now she has changed the dress code policy... i can't wear my flip flops and if you were here you couldn't wear your high heels....
and a lot of talk about letting BITCH come back....
if so i am LEAVING... if i don't have a job oh well i will find one....
Do you have any every other weekend job openings?????
If so let me know....
my mom is so stressed out she is about to have a break down....
oh and i can't wear basically all my clothes she went through there and wrote basically everything i wear down....
Girl, i am about to scream......
e-mail me back
Tracie

I find it odd that NOW she decides that Nepotism is a real issue. Its hilarious that when questioned about her Lil Heifer daughter working there she said that they were "grandfathered" in since they were both there before the new policy was written. By the way, Lil' Heifer is now working back at the office that she was "banned" (ha) from. Big surprise!

The best part is that I have filed a grievance about my last paycheck. So Big Momma got a Big Shock coming to her when she gets a call from the State Department of Labor.

I do hope that Tracie finds something to save her from the nightmare she is having to endure!

Copper

To quote emimem

......but in this industry I'm the cause of a lot of envy,

so when i am not put on this list the shit does not offend me.

Thats why you see me walk around like nothings bothering me.

Even though half you people got a fuckin problem with me.

You hate it but you know respect you've got to give me....

I hope this survey is over soon!

I also hope all this animosity at work dies down soon!!

Don't hate me for doing my job, its what I am here for. Don't sweat what I do, just do YOU!!

Inspect This!!!!

We are getting ready for inspection at the office. That's why I have not been too active lately. Seems like all efforts get redirected to WORK! I have not been able to go tan, give myself a manicure, take the dog to the groomers, any of that. The kids don't understand why mom stays on the phone giving orders all evening, after doing the same thing at the office for 8 hours! I am so over it!! If the next two weeks go off without a hitch it will all be worth it though!! More later...

Copper

Isn't it ironic?

Irony follows me. Usually its laughable, sometimes not. But I was in a reflective mood, so I googled "irony". I liked these quotes and thought I would share them:

“Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.”

Erica Jong

“The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.”

Robert A. Heinlein

“My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch”

Jack Nicholson

“"Why does everyone run toward a blood curdling scream? It is contrary to all sense."

Terry Pratchett

“A mind is like a parachute. If it doesn't open, you're fucked!”

Don Williams Jr.

Faster, Baby, Faster!

TOP 10 REASONS WHY SEX AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA

10. Short Stuff: According to the relativistic theory of length contraction, this is an inevitable consequence of having sex at the speed of light. An average penis of length 13cm traveling at 99% the speed of light will contract down to a length of only 1.8cm (this is about the same length as the smallest functional penis officially recorded). At the speed of light, length contraction leads to an interesting situation in which the penis seems to have no length at all, but is still managing to have sex somehow. (Sounds like a few past hook-ups, and it was NOT due to contraction!)

9. Da black hole: At the speed of light, relativity also predicts that the penis will essentially become a black hole. When its owner realises that his penis has turned into a black hole, he will become profoundly depressed and overcome by a feeling of loss. John Bobbitt would understand; but Mr Bobbitt had his penis sewn back on, whereas a penis lost to a black hole is a penis lost forever.

8. A ghost of your former self: If the penis is not lost to a black hole, it will be lost to the uncaring force of friction. A penis traveling in and out of a vagina at close to the speed of light will be subjected to enormous resistance. Since the resistance is co-related to speed, this will heat up the penis enormously. The temperature of the resulting internal environment will be so high that the penis molecules will actually undergo a phase transition into a gas, vaporising the penis almost instantaneously.

7. Flaming spew: In the unlikely event that a vaporised penis can perform ejaculation, then the semen will create enormous air resistance, burst into flames almost instantaneously, and generate enormous impact forces. These forces will be sufficient to pierce a small hole straight through a woman's lower torso, just like a speeding bullet, only incinerating the surrounding tissue as it passes through.

6. Dead Fu**: Unfortunately, the woman will probably be dead before ejaculation anyway. According to the relativistic theory of time dilation, then if the man is to actually thrust in and out at a speed close to the speed of light, then from his point of view, his partner will be ageing extremely quickly, and will be long dead before he ejaculates. Legally, he will be committing necrophilia. (eww)

5. Money shot: Dead fu**, flaming spew and penile black hole formation are all very dramatic, but unfortunately they don't translate well onto the big screen. In reality, sex would only last for a fraction of a second, and would appear as a sort of muddy grayish white smudge, since the eye merges all images together at such high speeds. This is probably not visually appealing enough to make a porn-at-the-speed-of-light series out of.

4. Religious values: Certain branches of Christianity would view porn-at-the-speed-of-light immoral anyway. It's in the Bible.

3. Property damage: A penis is made up of a collection of charged molecules, and accelerating charged molecules emit radiation. To accelerate charged penis molecules up to the speed of light in a single thrust requires crazy speeds. This would produce a frequency and intensity of radiation similar to that produced by a small nuclear explosion. It may be worth hiring out a hotel room if you don't want your own room obliterated.

2. Big Bang Theory: As a penis works up to the speed of light, it will inevitably break the sound barrier, producing deafening sonic booms with every inward and outward thrust. If the neighbours haven’t already been woken by your moaning, they will be now. Or then again maybe not, because they will be conveniently deafened and unable to hear you.

1. Excessive dietary requirements: The amount of energy needed to get an average

person up to 99% the speed of light for a single inward thrust is outrageous. It is equivalent to the amount of energy gained by consuming 78 trillion crackers. But 78 trillion crackers will increase an average person’s mass by approximately 1.2 trillion kilograms, requiring them to eat even more crackers just to speed up this additional load up to the speed of light. Nine out of ten nutritionists may recommend whole grains, but this is slightly more than the recommended daily intake.

In conclusion, better try the "slow poke"!!!

Copper

Can you ever forgive me?

I have been gone for an eternity I know. I did not mean to leave with no notice, but sometimes things happen that are out of our control.

That said, I want to applogise for leaving David hanging. I was scheduled to judge the blog awards last week and with all the equipment trouble that I have been having, I was never able to tell him I was unable to log on. So David, I am truly sorry!

Work is going well. Its been very busy here, which I guess is a good thing. I have job security that way.

The old man is pressuring me to tie the knot. I will have to make a detailed post for you about this one, its amazing. I don't understand why he wants to marry me so bad. We don't even like each other!

I got drunk and went bowling this weekend. Well actually, I went bowling and was feeling so self conscious about my skills that I decided to try and dull the embarrassment of gutter balls, by knockin back way too many. Then when I had finally decided that I had had enough, here comes the owner of the place (I think he thought my ass was cute) comes up, bottle in hand, and says "Ya gotta try this sweetie, just got 'em in today. They are new, you'll love it" I did. I drank 4 of them. Then walked home. Left the car at the bowling alley. Who needed it? I was feelin too good! I have also decided that I like to bowl....

So sorry that this has been so short, but I am back up and runnin. I might even post again later today!

Copper